Self Esteem & Self Image

We all have thousands of thoughts each and every day. We can even have several different thoughts within a minute. With this being said we have tendencies to cast things in a certain light depending upon our experiences that have shaped our beliefs about the world, other people and ourselves. We all have tendencies to either view things in a positive way or in a negative one.

People often saying things like “Life is too hard”, “I am not good at anything”, “I am weak”, “No one really loves me”. For thoughts like these we need to look for the evidence that these things are not in fact true.

Here are some examples of these negative thoughts and ways to shift to a positive perspective:

“Life is too hard”

• Shift to: “Life is hard sometimes and I always find a way to make things work” or “In the end things do seem to work out for me okay”
• Life is hard sometimes and you are still here to acknowledge that which says you can make through hard things.

“I am not good at anything”

• Shift to: “I am a good [cook, friend, wife/husband, writer, artist]”
• Challenge yourself to focus on the things you are good at. Each and every one of us has some gift or talent.

“I am weak”

• Shift to: “I am strong enough to ask for help” or “My strength was shown when I made through…”
• It is human to have moments of weakness and those moments it helps to think back on other times your strength shined through.

“No one really love me”

• Shift to: “My ________ tells me they love me”, “_______ showed me love by being kind to me”, “I love ____ about myself”
• While there may be times that others can’t show their love to us, most of us can find examples of someone who has been kind, caring or loving towards us. When we really start to pay attention, love is all around us shown by people helping each other and small gestures of kindness in every day life.

Some things are all about perspective and it can help to challenge your negative thoughts and those that aren’t serving you. When you find you are consistently saying negative messages to yourself, try looking for the evidence for the opposites of those that increase your feelings of unhappiness.

An unchallenged mind is an unhealthy one. Only you can start to pay attention to your thoughts and work to find new, healthier, happier and more affirming messages to tell yourself.